Happy birthday to me! A year can be a long or a short time. To put perspective on how long a year really is I am going to equate a moment to one second. That means you have 31 536 000 (Thirty-One Million, Five Hundred and Thirty-Six thousand) distinct moments in one year.

To live in gratitude for every moment would create a life with a significant amount of joy. Being love and sharing love in each of those moments would create an unimaginable bliss.

I must admit that although I think about Love and being love, it is still a state from which my mind is barring me. I think too much about everything. To know something, to think about something and to be something are all different.

Every so often I get a glimpse of what is termed timeless moments. Some are best captured by the words to which they are attached.

Tshimo said to me, “…Daddy, let’s just spend time together…”. Those words stopped me in my tracks, I then realised that very little matters in life. There was no need to plan an outing or an activity or any such, all we needed was to be there. It did not matter how much money I had or where we were or what we were doing!

 “Daddy, I want to tell you something. I Love You” – Kagiso. This is a usually a random act and in that moment I pause, look into her eyes, time seems to stand still and there is no need to think. Moments like those shine a ray of light through an often cluttered and dark life. A moment to remind me that there is hope eternal.

“Thank you Karabo” – Neo. Gratitude is the lesson in each utterance of those words. Neo is as sincere and honest as anyone. He will voice his opinion as best he can without worrying about the outcome. He lives in the moment with love.

The book I am currently reading “Personhood, the art of being fully human” has in its preface a quote “I realise today that nothing in the world is more distasteful to a man than to take a path that leads to himself” –Herman Hesse Demian. This quote sums up my sentiments about the past year.

My reflection on the past year has led me a little further back in my observation. I have spent the past decade in disappointment at so much. I felt like a failure in all aspects of my life. I thought that I failed everyone in my life including myself. I could not find any good in anything I did or tried to do. I ended up in a state of pure resentment. I then blamed everyone and everything around me for the state of my life. Those closest to me felt the brunt of my outburst.

I apologise to those I hurt not because I think what I did was wrong, I apologise because I lacked empathy. I acted with only my desires in mind. I acted with a total lack of awareness and responsibility. This, my 40th year on earth, and beyond will be spent with a conscious effort to realise myself and therefore my potential as a life.

I will

  • PAUSE, OBSERVE & Not JUDGE.
  • Be the Love I wish to experience
  • SHARE

The choices I make, the processes of life & the pleasant and unpleasant outcomes are what life is .I am responsible for my life, I am the creator and the creation of this life I live each moment like it is the last because it might just be!

Always remember, You are Love and You are Loved.

Today I dedicate this song to myself Rent’s – Seasons of Love

Lyrics

Five hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes.
Five hundred twenty-five thousand moments so dear.
five hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes.
How do you measure,
Measure a year?
In daylights?
In sunsets?
In midnights?
In cups of coffee?
In inches, in miles, in laughter, in strife?
In five hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes.
How do you measure a year in a life?
How about love?
How about love?
How about love?
Measure in love…
Seasons of love (love)…
Seasons of love (love)…Five hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes.
Five hundred twenty-five thousand journeys to plan.
Five hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes.
How do you measure a life of a woman or a man?
In truths that she learned,
or in times that he cried?
In bridges he burned,
or the way that she died?
It’s time now to sing out,
though the story never ends.
Let’s celebrate remember a year in a life
of friends
Remember the love…
(Oh, you’ve got to you’ve got to remember the love)
Remember the love…
(You know the love is a gift from up above)
Remember the love…
(Share love, give love, spray love, measure your life in love.)
Seasons of love…
Seasons of love…

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